Summer with G and E

The Little Girls

Gudrun is away in Philadelphia and I am taking care of Georgie and Elise. Man, they can be a lot of work. They know how to push me right to the edge, then do something so sweet that I forget what I was so frustrated about. Elise has today starting calling me 'Daddy' after months of 'Gaga'

That was months ago and now "Gaga" is gone for good

Spider update

The spider out front is really starting to give me the creeps. It has doubled its size in the last week and now has a creepy friend, a miniature version of itself. It looks sinister. I am feeling the urge to kill it. The American way is rubbing off on me. Anything foreign or strange must be assimilated or destroyed. This spider is never going to come around to my way of life so it has to go. I really have no choice. America is like the Borg. Resistance is futile

The spider disappeared one day, leaving his little friend alone. This both relieved and bothered me. Where did he go? He was there so long and put all that work into that crazy web. A few days later, he or one just like him appeared on our porch, with a new web in the making. He was getting closer! I didn't have to worry about him too long. The weather got cooler and they were both gone. We'll see if they come back this spring.

The Vagina Monologues

A while ago, in the summer, Georgie would often adopt funny poses, with her legs open. Standing, sitting, lying she would do it as though she was doing some kind of stretching routine. In her car seat, she often had one leg draped over the side. When I would check on her at night and she was often spread-eagled, covers off. One day in the car with the whole family, my mother included, she said, “Do you know why I open my legs like this?” We didn’t know and actually kinda wondered. She told us, “Because my vagina always gets stuck together!” I didn’t comment. This was clear mom territory. "Mommy, why does my vagina always get stuck together?!” She replied that it was due to a ‘design flaw’. Good one there Gudrun, but not good enough. “Mommy, what is a design flaw?”

Not many days later I picked the girls up from preschool and Georgie excitedly told me that that day she had learned to be respectful and keep her legs closed. I asked her if someone had told her to keep her legs closed. But she would admit to nothing.

While I was changing Elise’s diaper she started talking about her “naihna”. She usually points to herself and says, “ma naihna” then says, “Daddy’s naihna?” I replied that I don't actually have a "naihna" but did not seem convinced. Now, Elise is much more interested in bottoms, which she refers to as "butts" or "butt-butts".

Candler Park, June 10, 2009

Breakfast in the house. Got the girls dressed, suncreened and ready. We dropped Gudrun off at her North Decatur office then returned to Starbucks for coffee and snacks. Emory village Starbucks, where I will one day earn the coveted gold card. The girls shared a doughnut but Elise wasn't crazy about it. They are still in banana bread withdrawal. They don't have it here. I, too, am suffering. But we soldier on. They sat in their favourite spot. The big leather armchairs. They were very proud of themselves to be in these comfy chairs. It is a rare occasion they are free. These are prime seats for the Emory students and faculty that make up most of the customers here. They shot us nasty looks and went sit on the rock-hard wooden chairs, setting up their cool sticker-covered MAC notebooks. Soon the "numb bum" set in as they pretended to work but actually just whiled away time on facebook. Maybe they weren't really pretending to work. Meanwhile, Georgie and Elise had the time of their lives, drunk on sugar and leather upholstery. I sat at the next table and pretended they weren't with me. I tried to read the paper but my cover was blown when Elise asked for more treats.

We left the Emory crowd to their Twitter feeds and drove down lovely Clifton Road to Candler Park and the playground. A great morning of playing. Not too busy. We walked down to the golf course. Georgie wanted to know exactly where you hit the ball to and from. Then we climbed (both girls up the cargo net), swung, slid, teetered, tottered, and ran around until all the fun that was there to be had was had. Georgie really warmed up to the place. We also played hide and seek. (Elise now directs the game by saying, "Say one two free!") We stopped for a snack of cantaloupe and rice crispy bars. Both girls were hot and sweaty, as was I. It was 85 and humid.

Next was a shopping trip to Publix. They rode in the cart made to look like a car. They each had a seat and a steering wheel but still fight over personal space.

After lunch Georgie and I watched her "Melody movie" She enjoyed seeing it on the big screen. I liked sitting next to her on the couch. She always likes it when we watch with her.

We ended the day with a trip to the Eagle for a swim. The pool was closed for a while due to lightning but eventually they 'released the hounds' and all the parents and kids stampeded into the compound. It rained. I had Georgie and Gudrun had Elise. They had a great time in their inner tubes. The pool is quite warm but not as warm as it will be in a few weeks.

The High Museum

Today was to be rain and more rain so we had to think of something to do. Yesterday, it had been enough to sit on our friends sun deck, squint and get all sweaty. We even complained about the heat, though it was not even 70 degrees. The winter has made us forget what it is like here most of the year: hot to stinking hot. Still, it's hard to get used to a summer day in March.

Gudrun was intent on doing something that would get the girls' ya-yas out but did not know what this might be. I suggested Leapin' lizards, an insane indoor jumping play area as one option but it can be unpleasant in there for the parents. Sure, the girls have a blast but we have to deal with all the little shit-head kids whose parents are nowhere to be found, the noise level, the static electricity, the injuries. So, since our happiness is important to us, we opted for the art museum in midtown Atlanta. We are members, and we rationalized that it will be "good" for the kids.

I had slept in until after 10 am. This seems outrageous for a father of two until you consider that our entire family is on a strange version of southern time. The girls stay up late and rarely wake up before 8 am. This morning it was closer to 9. I just got a little bonus time today, a gift from my lovely wife. It took us a long time to get out of the house and eventually we were bickering (Gudrun and I were, the girls were happy as anything). On the way we stopped for coffee which had a miraculous effect on our moods. We arrived at the High Museum of Art just before 12 noon to find a considerable line-up. There is an exhibit on the "Allure of the Automobile" and this has brought out the car show crowd, as well as the usual MOA types. Some here may be sad to learn there are no NASCARs in the exhibit.

The girls impressed the other people in the line up by giggling and yelling and running around. I wish we had such charming kids, they thought. I played the part of the grumpy dad, impatiently telling Georgie and Elise to stop doing this and that, and to try to not be so loud, etc. Gudrun was polite to not point out that I was being somewhat of a buzz kill.

The car exhibit was actually quite impressive (and I think cars are silly). Or rather, I think the love of cars is silly. But there was an Aston Martin in there that I am pretty sure is the coolest car ever. It was a 1961, I think. It looked like the real version of the James Bond car model my cousin Bruce had when we were kids. There were some other really silly big cars from the 30s and 40s and some neato early french and Italian jobs.

Mostly though, we hung out in the kids area where the girls got to interact with various media and learn about art (they drew on dry-erase boards, played with blocks and stuck magnetized things on a wall). Georgie did get to see a couple of Rodin pieces and seemed interested in the whole sculpture thing. Elise was bent on touching things which was stressful. The kids' area is all about interaction while most of the museum is of course not. Not an easy concept for a two-and-a-half year old. When Elise debuted her performance art piece: I got some art for ya right here in my pants, we knew it was time to call it a day.

The day of rain had not materialized and it had turned into a sunny warm afternoon. We left the museum and stepped out into the courtyard bathed in sunshine. Once again we squinted without our shades. We enjoyed the sculpture and other pieces outside. The girls were equally intrigued by the model house and the cherry blossoms on the tree next to it. We had a nice stroll up Peachtree to our car and were happy to find no ticket. Looking back, the museum looked fabulous amidst the skyscrapers of midtown.

We made it home before the skies became threatening. As they did, the temperature went up which was strange. It got darker. The Bay Hill Invitational was interrupted for the severe weather alert and tornado warning. Soon there was thunder and the big rain came. We haven't had a rain like this since the fall. Rumours of the tornado, it turns out, were greatly exaggerated.